var howMany = 58
var quote = new Array(howMany+1)
     quote[0]="If you grew up thinking filaria only happened to fat ladies in the market."
     quote[1]="If you understand that an offer to go an' knock/lash a chinee  might not be as much fun if you don't find at least one roach in your rice."
     quote[2]="If you know that 'bakin' 'pon' and 'gettin a no ball' has nothing to do with an oven and cricket respectively."
     quote[3]="If you fgured out that catching crabs was easy if you could avoid the tengle- leh."
     quote[4]="If you endured Mass Games and learned nothing about God."
     quote[5]="If you have ever been' vatored' or' vice', had a'buss-head' or a'boongie'."
     quote[6]="If, having seen Pancho on TV, you have decided that GT was better off without it."
     quote[7]="If you knew that Colonel Ferdinand was never in the GDF......just GBC."
     quote[8]="If you know that neither 'eye pass' nor 'fat eye' relate to optometry."
     quote[9]="If your BeeTee winks when you hear that the Bongo Squad had you shortlisted for an imminent interview......and you can still read this list."
     quote[10]="If you call anyone who studies harder than you a 'Book Worm'."
     quote[11]="If you (personally) know at least one 'catchar' who has 'cut up yuh runnings'."
     quote[12]="If you have 'put two bob pon yuh ticket'."
     quote[13]="If very early on in your dating life you realized that he who walks....walks alone."
     quote[14]="If you know that 'Number 63' is a beach."
     quote[15]="If you know dat 'Lot 12' is not a place to visit or be living."
     quote[16]="If you considered the very concept of growing old in Uncle Eddie's or 'The Palms'or 'The Dharam Sala' to be an oxymoron."
     quote[17]="If you know that 'Rice- Eater' is a species of dog." 
     quote[18]="You know that 'pokey' and 'lowlee' are polar opposites as it were."
     quote[19]="You can understand how the words 'yuh big scunt' can be either an affectionate greeting, or a gross insult."
     quote[20]="During a conversation someone mentions the word 'backoo' and you know what it means. Further you know that they are kept in 'brown bottle' and live on bananas and milk."
     quote[21]="You find it impossible to explain to colleagues exactly what a labba is...but you know that you can curry it."
     quote[22]="You always laugh or suck yuh teeth whenever strangers,(island people in particular) show you 'a river'."
     quote[23]="In your view humming birds 'stickle' not hover."
     quote[24]="You know how much is 'Jonah Crown', and only 'big eye' people tek dat much."
     quote[25]="You know when is 'Dig Dutty Day'."
     quote[26]="You can play 'marble' with a 'taw' (iron taw is de best, because you can bus de Awara and Curu seed taw when you 'beefing' after getting you taw in de 'gulley')." 
     quote[27]="You play wid fire you gon pee you bed." 
     quote[28]="You know dat an 'English Duck' is not an animal."
     quote[29]="You know how fo play 'Taga'." 
     quote[30]="You know that a 'dam bed' is not furniture in de house." 
     quote[31]="You know 'Coolie water rice, poke-n-spice, wash u-b-t with dhal-n-rice', 'Black man sala, pound massala, thief e mumma choka 'n' run a koka'." 
     quote[32]="You call a quarter a Bobb."
     quote[33]="You go into a store and ask de shop keeper if they sell aggie, and he look at you as if ya mad."
     quote[34]="You went to de cane field one hundred times in ya life, but ya didn't peel the cane with de cutlass, yuh use yuh teeth." 
     quote[35]="Ya is a girl ya play dolly house baking mud pies in coconut shells and ya dolly is de pointa broom."
     quote[36]="You know that 'molee biscuit' and 'vhum-vhum cheese' don't refer to a delicacy."
     quote[37]="You know that to 'fly uncle charlie kite' has nothing to do with Easter."
     quote[38]="You know exactly what 'caanta' means."
     quote[39]="Either you know how to 'mek it' or you know somebody who does 'mek a good kankee'."
     quote[40]="You realize that yuh could never depend on the six o'clock bee to sound off on time."
     quote[41]="At some time in yuh life yuh played 'weigh saltfish, weigh poke'."
     quote[42]="On at least one occasion, at Christmas, yuh end up with a cork gun instead of a caps gun." 
     quote[43]="Yuh know that 'no big ting' was a radio program."
     quote[44]="Yuh expect every corporation in the US to have a name starting with Ameri... since it seemed that everything in Guyana started with Guy." 
     quote[45]="Yuh know that yuh had to 'fight down' dem bannas at the market to get a good price for the goods yuh buy."
     quote[46]="Yuh know how fuh 'shark' in a party then 'cop a beenie' and get some good 'fine wine'."
     quote[47]="Yuh know what happens when a woman 'stereo playing low'."
     quote[48]="Yuh know what happens when a man 'off side'."
     quote[49]="Yuh know what happens when a man got a 'go-dee'."
     quote[50]="Yuh know what is a 'frenchie'."
     quote[51]="Yuh know what is a 'top stick'."
     quote[52]="You know what is 'sugar cake'.... 'rice cake'... 'chi-nee cake'.... 'black cake'... 'Patta cake'."
     quote[53]="Yuh know what is a 'ganga egg'."
     quote[54]="Yuh know what is a 'bull cow'."
     quote[55]="Yuh know what happens when a 'bull jump a cow'."
     quote[56]="Yuh know what happens when a fowl cock 'thread' a hen."
     quote[57]="Yuh know what is a 'dogjook'." 
     quote[58]="You always stir your rum on the rocks with your finger." 
function rndnumber(){
var randscript = -1
while (randscript < 0 || randscript > howMany || isNaN(randscript)){
randscript = parseInt(Math.random()*(howMany+1))
}
return randscript
}
quo = rndnumber()
quox = quote[quo]
document.write(quox)